In any town in any city in any country in any continent on any planet in any universe in any space go to a house. Not just any house, a black house. In that house go upstairs. You will find a skeleton. Beside that skeleton you will find a phone. With a Number. The number is 699-699-6969. Call the number and pray that there is no answer. If it is answered, a soul sucking demon will say "Welcome to Jizzy's House of Pleasure. Will you like to book a session?" Say no instantly to the demons. If you say yes, it will suck your soul out of your penis. After that, if you are to look were the skeleton was, he will be gone. Only if you call the horny demons he will disappear. Search the house for him. If you are smart, leave. If you are like a person in a horror movie, stay. If you go with a minority he will die because he will die. After that you will find another phone. Don't call anyone. Just hold it. Then a skeleton will pop out.
This skeleton is number 94837573748573738484847584948574848482892929293847575757574729 out of 253. The holder of lies because I'm totally not lying.